About
Halli Hallo.
I’m Kaitlyn Grace Schaefer, Founder of Mothering With Grace.
I am a doula and a yoga practitioner in Frisco and the Dallas-Forth Worth Metroplex, and I have a Masters of Arts in Physical Activity and Health from the University of Erlangen-Nuremberg in Bavaria, Germany.
I speak German and English. I have lived, studied and worked in three different countries and international life is my normal. I like to say that I was born in Canada, I grew up in Germany, and now, I am raising my own family in Frisco, Texas.
I enjoy travelling to new places, exploring nature and the natural wonders of this world, spending nights under the stars camping with my family, searching for secondhand treasures at a „Flohmarkt“ (or flea market), cooking up a storm in the kitchen and curling up with tea and a good book.
I have put my hope and faith in Jesus, and I think this shows in my work. I am used to being the new kid on the block, the expat, the immigrant - take your pick. I know what it is like to have no network and build that from the ground up, several times over.
I have been where you are. Not exactly, but in my own unique version of pregnancy, birth, postpartum and motherhood.
For my first birth, my waters broke but the contractions never came. I had an induction, epidural and episiotomy. My milk flowed and breastfeeding came easier than I thought.
For my second, my waters broke, but my contractions finally came this time around. I had an all natural birth in under three hours. Breastfeeding was a challenge though. My baby had tongue tie which we got taken care of, but feeding was extremely painful for the first four weeks, and there were countless times when I wanted to give up. With an amazing maternal care team in place, I got through those tough times. I did not have to go it alone, and neither do you.
If anything mentioned on Mothering With Grace resonated with you; if you’re even the slightest bit curious; or if you definitely want a doula and/or yoga support, then let’s connect and see if we are a good fit for each other.
Why the name “Mothering With Grace?”
The name “Mothering With Grace” was born out of a few different convictions.
First, the practice of “mothering the mother” which prioritizes the wellbeing of the mother after childbirth, and caring for her and nurturing her similarly to that of a newborn baby.
Second, the practice of showing yourself grace when times are tough and the struggle is real, is central to Mothering With Grace. This means showing yourself kindness, compassion, and understanding during some of the most vulnerable, challenging and beautiful times in life.
Finally, Mothering With Grace also pays homage to my grandmother, Grace, which is also my middle name. My grandmother immigrated from the Netherlands to Canada on a boat in 1953 at the age of 12 with her parents and siblings. She could not speak English, her father died a few weeks after arriving, and Grace, with her mother and brothers were sent to the field to pick beans to make ends meet. At school, the teachers could not pronounce her given Dutch name, Gietje, so she went by Grace from then on.
So, in graciousness and gratitude to all the women who have come before us and all the women who will come after us, I give you, Mothering With Grace.
Why choose a doula?
When answering this question, many doulas point toward a specific study that was conducted with convincing statistics about the benefits of choosing a doula, concluding that women who chose a doula were:
39% less likely to have a c-section
31% less likely to use Pitocin to speed up labor
12% less likely to have an epidural
These numbers are important and valid, and many women hire a doula because of these stats alone. However, doulas are not responsible for birth outcomes, doulas don’t have “Caesarean rates” (unlike ob-gyns), and statistics like these make it sound like only one version of birth is ideal with minimal to no medical support.
Narrowing down a doula’s support to these numbers leaves so much out. Numbers are certainly important, but rather than specific medical outcomes, doulas care much more about:
whether a woman felt that she had agency and decision-making power during birth
whether a woman felt supported during her birth
whether a woman felt she was able to ask for and receive what she needed during their birth
whether a woman felt her birth was honoured as an important life event rather than just a medical event
So while it's amazing to have studies that demonstrate some of the impact birth doulas can have, it feels a bit unfinished. When we place too much emphasis on the epidural/Pitocin/c-section statistics, we leave out various other important aspects of how doulas improve birth experiences.
Mothering With Grace is about empowering women to have a positive experience in pregnancy, birth, postpartum and beyond into motherhood. When a woman has agency, feels supported, can get what she needs (without being made to feel like a burden) and she is respected by the people accompanying her during birth, she is much more likely to have a positive birth experience.
FAQs
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A birth doula assists a woman and her family before and during childbirth. They provide non-medical emotional and physical support during pregnancy and the birthing process. Doulas work with the rest of the birthing team, and are there to assist the birthing person and support their helpers or partners but not to replace them.
A postpartum doula provides families information and support on infant feeding, emotional and physical recovery from childbirth, infant soothing, and coping skills for new parents. They might also help with light housework, fix a meal and help incorporate an older child into this new experience.
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The presence of a doula can be beneficial no matter what type of birth you are planning. Many women report needing fewer interventions when they have one. It’s important to note that the primary role of the doula is to help mothers have a safe and positive birth - not to help them choose the type of birth. For women who have decided to have a medicated birth, a doula will provide emotional, informational, and physical support through labor, the same as in a unmedicated birth.
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For a woman deciding to have a cesarean birth, a doula can be helpful by providing constant support and encouragement. Often a cesarean results from an unexpected situation leaving a mother feeling unprepared, disappointed, and lonely. A doula can be attentive to the mother at all times throughout the cesarean, letting her know what is going on throughout the procedure. This can free the partner to attend to the baby and accompany the newborn to the nursery if there are complications.
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The role of the doula is never to take the place of partners in labor, but rather to complement and enhance their experience. Today, more partners play an active role in the birth process. However, some partners prefer to enjoy the delivery without having to stand in as the labor coach.
By having a doula as a part of the birth team, a partner is free to do whatever they choose. A doula can encourage the partner to use comfort techniques and can step in if they want a break. Having a doula allows the partner to support the woman emotionally during labor and birth and to also enjoy the experience without the added pressure of trying to remember everything they learned in childbirth class!
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All packages are private pay and a 50% non-refundable retainer is due at the time of contract signing. The remaining 50% is due by 36 weeks gestation. If signing the contract from 36 weeks or later, the full amount is due at that time.
Please note that all services, rendered or not, are non-refundable. By signing a contract with me, I am committing my time and attention to you and your family, and I therefore will be unable to book other clients. Thank you for respecting this small business policy.
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“Pay What You Can” means you pay for what you can afford. I believe every woman has the right to support during pregnancy, birth and postpartum, regardless of her socioeconomic status. Every 6 months I am able to offer support to those in need. If this is you, please write me an email explaining your situation, and let’s connect further to see what might be possible.
What People Are Saying
“Self-care is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. When you care for yourself, you create the foundation to care for others.”
— Erica Chidi, Nurture